(H&S) Hustles & Sharks - Musical Auditions

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Are there styles of music that you enjoy? Maybe some rhythm and blues, jazz, classical, doo wop, heavy metal, show tunes, etc. are part of your music library. The stronger your appreciation of music, the greater is the agony suffered from this shark.

The hustler can do things with musical notes and pitch that offends – greatly. There are three variations of how this shark is presented:

Humming
Whistling
Lyric mumbling

The choice of the musical notes is vaguely based on the hustler’s personal preference. Whatever is used, the selected so-called musical segment contains a limited repertoire – four to nine notes.

The notes extracted from some song, have just enough similarity to the original song so that the tune can be recognized. The note sequence of the song is mangled to add to the personal irritation you suffer. Your sense of musical appreciation is further aggravated and abused by constant and continuous repetition and with varying volumes.

There are three game situations where this effort of musical notoriety is presented for your appreciation. His variations are offered at seemingly random times, but primarily during:

His analysis and setup – but quieter and more restrained.
Your analysis and setup – with more emphasis and volume.

If the hustler also happens to be a champion whistler, he can use that skill when judging the results of each shot. He varies the “tune” according to the shot results. For a pocketed ball, a upbeat set of notes. He emits another positive trill for getting good position. For your good shot and good position, you get a set of 4-6 notes. For his, a set of 10-15 notes.

For miss, he provides a set of melancholy downer notes, something plaintive in a minor key. For your failures, he offers up a set of 8-10 notes, for his failures, 4-6. Remember the purpose is to establish this as part of his playing style and used enough to develop irritated feelings.

Response

There are several ways to respond to the Musical Auditions shark. One of these is to interrupt him in mid-trill and ask, “What song is that? It seems familiar.” Make sure you force him to answer. Then say something like, “I love that song.”

When/if he uses that same set of notes, join in with your musical contribution. It is important that you do an even worse job of the musical rendition than he is. Feel free to be wildly out of tune and increase the volume. When he stops (probably in amazement at your audacity), continue carrying on with your version. Apply the same style (whistling, humming, or lyrics) as he is using.

Even if the tune is unfamiliar, it doesn’t matter. Fake your way through. After you are going solo for a few seconds, stop and ask him how he likes your style. Keep a look of pleasant enjoyment on your face. (There is no need to use sarcasm or evil enjoyment – play this straight.)

Basically, you want to turn his efforts around and present him with the musical distractions, confusions, and irritations. It’s easy to override his attempts simply by being more aggressive and louder.

When you notice that he is wincing or frowning, you have beaten him. After that, continue this reverse sharking by using an occasional snatch of music here and there. As needed, include a few encouragements along the way, such as “Come on, all together now.” and “You’re not keeping up.”

If this “playacting” is not within your skills, you can use the “angry” approach. Declare to all who are within earshot of the table that this guy’s sharking attempt is one of the most stupid things you have ever experienced in your lifetime of playing pool. At no time is any attempt of strangulation required to counter this shark.